I'm kidding actually. I do enjoy the rain when there's no thunder of course. I hate thunderstorms! I don't understand why I'm so afraid of thunder, it just scares me. I suppose I am just a safe, no loud sounds kind of girl. Sometimes I feel like the thunder is going to blow my ear drums and I am going to assume that will hurt. I stay away from anything that will hurt me. I am constantly flinching at everything, unless I was upset or really angry then maybe it would be more work to scare me off.
Well, its day 34203948 of searching for a job and I am unsuccessful. I found out this morning that Forever 21 at Maplewood Mall & MOA are hiring sooooo after dropping my sister off at her graduation rehearsal, I will be traveling all over the twin cities with my dearest boyfriend to drop off applications and possibly pick some up? I don't know yet. Right now, I don't know where else to look and its been such a stressful time for me. I will probably give Rainbow a few days before calling since the store manager said that he will be going through the applications on Monday. I wouldn't want my work to be rushed if I was the boss but we're all different so who knows. Um, on the good side of things, I got my orientation date confirmed - July 20. Check-in time will be from 8:00 - 8:30 AM. That means I have to get up SUPER early, maybe 6? on a tuesday to get ready then go to the U. I don't know if I will be driving and parking at the U or maybe I'll drop the car off at Andy's house and make him walk with me? I guess it all just depends on how early I get there. Walking would be great considering that there are a million pedestrians/bikers who so awesomely swarm the streets and it's impossible not to hit one.
So apparently my doctor is booked until September, which means I can't get an appointment to see her until then. I can get a lab done but if my thyroid level is down or up, they might have to change my prescription and all that crazy stuff so it's so much hassle and work but oh well. I need my pills anyway, its been too long since I've taken one and it's starting to take a toll on me. I have been extremely lethargic and lazy but that's just it. I'm not the worst of whatever out there but I guess we all have our own problems? I don't know.
Had JJ and watched old UFC fights with Andy last night. He was upset so I went over to cheer him up a little. His roommate is back so he won't have to worry about always being home alone and what not. It was a nice bonding time. We talked and what not. I'm starting to feel the relationship; it feels real now. I think that the many times I have been let down and ignored by him in the past made me skeptical of this relationship. I don't know why I tried so hard and what not but I guess now that I get what I want, I am happy with it. Sometimes I'm just scared that he'll just stop talking to me like how he did back then. I just don't want to get hurt, that's why at times I feel like how I did back then when it was just whatever. But it's different now. I can tell. He is a boyfriend now and not someone who might still be looking for something else.
I was texting Xai and the whole idea of me being happy because I'm with him now came up. I didn't question if I was happy or not. I am happy, extremely happy. I can't ask for anything or anyone else right now (other than a job of course) but everything is fine. I'm worrying too much! You know what, I'm just going to live with him day by day and we will see where it takes us. I will love him with all that I've got and give him all of me. He deserves it and we both don't want to be hurt. Even though we don't have much material wise, we have each other and that is all that matters :)
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